And The Secret To Happiness Is…

If you’re into personal growth and being the best version of you…and you haven’t heard of Tony Robbins, you’ve not been doing the right research. All roads now seem to lead to Tony, and once you know who he is, there’s no avoiding him – from motivational quotes on instagram through to his powerful clips on youtube he is accessible at all levels.

Those who delve a little deeper will discover Tony Robbins’ books (i’m yet to read one myself to be honest, but am well intended and now possess a brand new copy of Money: Master the Game!). Beyond that, for a mere £625.00 (around US$900) you can attend his 3 day “Unleash the Power Within” seminar on 27th to 30th April 2017 in London (or any of the other seminars he does around the world).

He’s worked with Mother Theresa, Obama, Opera Winfrey, Princess Diana, Bill Clinton and Nelson Mandela – now 39 years into his career – Mr Tony Robins, is himself a legend. I decided to pop along to “Achieving the Unimagined” at the National Achievers Congress 2016 #NacLon and see him in action; after discovering him back in July through his powerful film on Netflix. I watched it twice. And told everyone I know about it. I couldn’t wrap myself around the initial discomfort seeping out my Britishness and the then love I had for him and his bedside manner. I became obsessed. Who was this guy? Because whilst I was aware of him eg. his name and the fact he motivated people, I hadn’t yet fallen into his world as fully as I could have. The documentary reeled me in, like I think it will for many. 

The National Achievers Congress 2016 saw a handful of speakers, including Kevin Green, Andy Harrington and Sandy Jadega – all credible, successful entrepreneurs and coaches in their own rights; but Tony, the Keynote speaker of the event, left the other guys trailing behind in his golden guru dust. Sure, it was intriguing (if not a little suspicious) hearing about the stock markets and how you can make £12k a month from 30mins of your time a week; and i’m distinctly aware how important it is to be able to tell your story on the big stage and now feel like I do have a lot of work to crack on with (thanks Andy).

I even found myself wanting to get into property development after Kevin Green’s inspiring session that left us with strategic tips for building a property empire. But Tony, in all his 6’7 glory was like a suckerpunch. It’s not often you can laugh, dance, scream, cry and hug 3,000 strangers in 3 hours – but today I did. Bonds were made and business cards were swapped. This felt more like a lesson in self-love than a seminar for entrepreneurs. But we were reminded, in quite a forceful but necessary way, that to achieve the unimagined you must first look within.

“Your brain is thousands of years old and is built to survive. It’s your job to make you happy”.

We were all asked to imagine what life could be like if we had everything wanted. We were tasked with listing out what all those things were. Everyone pretty much wanted the same things – to be loved more, to get the spark back in their relationships, to have more money, to be more happy, to find true love……. but guess what. Even Tony, the big man himself, brings it back to the very simple concept that loving yourself is the key to happiness.

And we realise, in that moment, that not feeling good enough, alongside fearing not being loved, are all normal. There is nothing more humbling than 3000 people in a room all feeling the same way.

“The only thing that hurts you are stressful thoughts you start to believe.”

Around 80% of people in the room were business owners of some kind or self-employed. We learned how we were all building income streams that require us to operate deeply inside the business. Tony tell us, that this is what causes stress. We stretch ourselves too thinly and put ourselves in positions where we’re too in demand, and too disposable to others who need us. Tony emphasises that we need to be able to lead ourselves before we can effectively lead others – and once this is achieved we can then allow them the freedom to do so effectively without us being kept up at night fretting about all the mistakes that were being made that are outside our control. 


He was so close I wanted to touch him.

And the key to being able to lead ourselves effectively?


Or rather, raising our vibrations.

Tony refers to it more frequently, as being in a “beautiful state”.

Why I am telling you all this.

I am writing all this up because I feel compelled to share this knowledge with others. And I think its fair to say we could all do with a refresher from time to time, myself included. In the 12 years that i’ve been looking inside myself searching for answers, it’s only in the last 5 or 6 years that the concept of self-love has even been relatively on my radar, and probably really only in the last two years that i’ve been aware of the journey it takes to find your way back to loving yourself (assuming you might have, once) . My business partner and I laugh sometimes about this, as I used to admit that being my greatest fan has sometimes been an issue for me in the past, and she’ll retort about herself that “nope, i’m fine, i’m all good, packaged up and ready to go”. It inspired me to wanna be all packaged up and ready to go.

Ok, so one hour into the session we know that there are two key skills we need to learn as human beings, as entrepreneurs, parents, lovers etc. Skill #1 is the Science of Achievement. Success doesn’t need to be organic. Copy someone who you admire, look at what they do, discover their formula and mirror it. Then what you need to do is focus – become obsessed with the thing that you do / want to do. Study, observe, learn and get absolute clarity and commitment to it. Then take massive action. Keep changing until you find an effective strategy. Not too unlike iteration in start-ups. These are my own words now, but figure out the fastest, quickest, easiest and cheapest way to test if the thing you think is the thing you need to do, actually is. Validate it. See what traction returns to you. And then the 3rd “force of creation” as Tony called it, is good old fashioned grace. Or God. Or luck. Or whatever is your spiritual belief system. Skill #2 is the Art of Fulfilment, appreciating life in all its wonderful glory. Even when it gets messy sometimes.


If you’re still reading this, then well done to you. I’m now approaching well into the 1200 words mark which is more than double the recommended blog post word count! Doh.

That said, sometimes some things are worth spending more time over…

Ok look, nothing can quite bring the Tony experience to life other than experiencing it for yourself. Because the biggest takeaway for me today was 100% experiential. Tony shows you how you can raise your energy levels and easily swing from a place of suffering to a place of beauty in a matter of moments. And that equally, being in a beautiful state (as opposed to a place of suffering) longer term, takes practice. But with small steps and discipline you can get there. Throughout the session he worked interactively with the crowd to draw out people’s pain and then rapidly bring them to a sense of freedom and joy through different exercises (assuming that is what actually happened).

“There is no greater injustice in life than the injustice we do to ourselves.”

Something personal I gained from this 3-hour group session with the world’s greatest super coach was how important it is to have a daily practice. To practice self-discipline. To make yourself do something, even when it’s challenging. To prove to your mind that you can beat those negative lazy thoughts that say don’t bother doing that thing today.

Tony reckons there are only two mind-states you need to concern yourself with:

  1. Suffering
  2. Beautiful

Suffering comes from a place of lack. You don’t have XYZ. You have lost XYZ or you never had nor possibly ever will have XYZ. As a result you have less, well, pop in here whatever it is that you think you are going without. Love, friendship, money, respect etc. You get the idea. And energy attracts energy right?

On the flip side of this, Tony believes, and shows us how, you can switch your energy state quite easily – you just have to push yourself out your comfort zone to discover it. And you have to believe, I suppose, that there’s something greater out there. That this life, isn’t just a coincidence. You do need to believe a little in fate, to believe you can create your own destiny.

“You can condition yourself to have daily practices that raise your energy to a beautiful state. If you make it habit you’ll change your identity and become more beautiful in your mind. You’ll attract people who are also in beautiful states, and you’ll rub off on others too.”

It seems to me that if you can push yourself beyond what you thought was possible, then you can achieve things you never thought were possible. And Tony advocated this. 


Tony walks through the seminar hall talking to random attendees whilst sharing his pearls of wisdom.

When you reach level 10 and you think it’s time to stop – push yourself to 12. There is always more you can do. You can always strive for better than excellent.

I’ll leave the rest for you to discover in his books, videos and seminars but i’ll close with this final thought:

“Trade your expectations for appreciation and your whole world changes in that moment”.

Interested in attending Tony’s 3 day seminar in April 2017? You can find out more about it, what it involves, dates and costs on the event website